holding child's hand with IV

Support for Parents: Having a Child with Serious Medical Needs

June 5, 2024 General /Family

When you’re expecting a baby, there’s a lot of excitement and hope for the future. But sometimes, things don’t go as planned. Some families find out during pregnancy that there might be a problem with the baby, while others are surprised after the baby is born. Either way, it can be a really stressful and scary time.

Sometimes, things don’t go as planned, but there is support

If there’s a complication during pregnancy, you may have some time to prepare for what might happen after the baby is born. But if you find out at birth or soon after, it can be even more overwhelming because it’s unexpected.

Support For Parents

Your baby might need to start their life in the Neonatal Intensive Care Unit (NICU). This can be a scary place, but it’s also where you can learn a lot and get support.

mom sitting on floor planning

While your baby is in the NICU, take the time to get ready for when they come home. You’ll probably get connected with community resources that can help with things like feeding, physical therapy, and medical equipment. There are lots of different agencies out there to help, so don’t be afraid to ask questions and seek out more help if you need it. WIC is a great place to start.

Don’t be afraid to ask questions

When your baby finally comes home, it’s okay to set boundaries and rules for your home. Your baby might need a lot of care, with many doctor’s appointments, therapies, and maybe even surgeries. It’s a lot to handle, so don’t be afraid to ask for help from family and friends. They can help with chores, taking care of older siblings, cooking meals, or just giving you a break.

Don’t be afraid to ask for help

You might find yourself doing a lot of internet searches about your baby’s health needs. That’s normal, but make sure you’re looking at reliable websites (those ending in ‘.gov’ or ‘.edu’ are generally good sources). It’s also okay to feel a lot of different emotions during this time – like being overwhelmed, sad, or even guilty. Talk to professionals and get help if you need it. You don’t have to go through this alone.

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Check reliable websites - those ending in ‘.gov’ or ‘.edu’

Mom holding baby

Even though things might not be how you imagined, remember to enjoy your baby and celebrate their accomplishments.

Every child is special and has the potential to thrive, even if they have medical needs or disabilities. You are your baby’s biggest advocate, and you can help them reach their full potential.

Side Lying Hold

Side-Lying Hold

  1. For the right breast, lie on your right side with your baby facing you.
  2. Pull your baby close. Your baby’s mouth should be level with your nipple.
  3. In this position, you can cradle your baby’s back with your left arm and support yourself with your right arm and/or pillows.
  4. Keep loose clothing and bedding away from your baby.
  5. Reverse for the left breast.

This hold is useful when:

  • You had a C-section
  • You want to rest while baby feeds
  • You are breastfeeding in the middle of the night
  • You and your baby are comfortable in this position
Cross Cradle Hold

Cross-Cradle Hold

  1. For the right breast, use your left arm to hold your baby’s head at your right breast and baby’s body toward your left side. A pillow across your lap can help support your left arm.
  2. Gently place your left hand behind your baby’s ears and neck, with your thumb and index finger behind each ear and your palm between baby’s shoulder blades. Turn your baby’s body toward yours so your tummies are touching.
  3. Hold your breast as if you are squeezing a sandwich. To protect your back, avoid leaning down to your baby. Instead, bring your baby to you.
  4. As your baby’s mouth opens, push gently with your left palm on baby’s head to help them latch on. Make sure you keep your fingers out of the way.
  5. Reverse for the left breast.

This hold is useful when:

  • Your baby is premature
  • Your baby has a weak suck
  • Your baby needs help to stay latched
  • Your baby needs extra head support
  • You and your baby are comfortable in this position
Football Hold

Clutch or “Football” Hold

  1. For the right breast, hold your baby level, facing up, at your right side.
  2. Put your baby’s head near your right nipple and support their back and legs under your right arm.
  3. Hold the base of your baby’s head with your right palm. A pillow underneath your right arm can help support your baby’s weight.
  4. To protect your back, avoid leaning down to your baby. Bring baby to you instead.
  5. Reverse for the left breast.

This hold is useful when:

  • You had a C-section
  • You have large breasts
  • You have flat or inverted nipples
  • You have a strong milk let-down
  • You are breastfeeding twins
  • Your baby likes to feed in an upright position
  • Your baby has reflux
  • You and your baby are comfortable in this position
Breastfeeding Holds

Cradle Hold

  1. For the right breast, cradle your baby with your right arm. Your baby will be on their left side across your lap, facing you at nipple level.
  2. Your baby’s head will rest on your right forearm with your baby’s back along your inner arm and palm.
  3. Turn your baby’s tummy toward your tummy. Your left hand is free to support your breast, if needed. Pillows can help support your arm and elbow.
  4. To protect your back, avoid leaning down to your baby. Instead, bring your baby to you.
  5. Reverse for the left breast.

This hold is useful when:

  • Your baby needs help latching on
  • You and your baby are comfortable in this position
Breastfeeding Holds

Laid-Back Hold

  1. Lean back on a pillow with your baby’s tummy touching yours and their head at breast level. Some moms find that sitting up nearly straight works well. Others prefer to lean back and lie almost flat.
  2. You can place your baby’s cheek near your breast, or you may want to use one hand to hold your breast near your baby. It’s up to you and what you think feels best.
  3. Your baby will naturally find your nipple, latch, and begin to suckle.

This hold is useful when:

  • Your baby is placed on your chest right after birth
  • You have a strong milk let-down
  • You have large breasts
  • You and your baby are comfortable in this position